Confessions of a Former Pentecostal

When I was a child, my family attended a church that practiced the so-called Pentecostal gifts. We did not use the term “church;” we were a “fellowship.” There was no pastor; there were elders. All of the elders held a belief in what they called “plurality” in leadership, by which they inferred that pastors were not a NT office. One of them even had a teaching that the Nicolaitans in Revelation were people who held to the idea of singular leadership in the church.

It was not unusual for the Sunday worship to be interrupted by a “word” in tongues or a “prophecy.” People who asked for prayer were often “slain.” The service format was extremely informal. The song leader had no planned music; everyone was free to just call out a song title, which would be sung.

I remember many strange things about that church, despite the fact that I was so young. In hindsight, it was obviously God’s superintendence over my life in a way that would bring me to the Doctrines of Grace.

I recall that there was a stack of papers in the lobby every Sunday. Once when I looked at what was on them, I discovered that they were printouts of “prophecies” that were given the previous week. Even then it struck me as wrong. I remember asking my Dad, “Can they do that?” He remembers it too.

When I was about 10 or 11, a lady visitor from one of the other fellowships we were loosely associated with gave a “prophecy” that if we didn’t repent by a specified date, God would remove our lampstand. The church ended up splitting over that "word of prophecy." It was just vague enough that no one knew exactly whether the church had complied with what God was supposedly commanding.

Years later a friend invited me to go with him to church. It was the smaller of the two factions from that old church. During the elder's "message" he quoted prophecies given years back by Bro. France, as if they were Scripture. He carried a mini-cassette player in his pocket and a pile of tapes that were cued up to the relevant sections of these “prophecies.” They even had hand-outs in the lobby of printed copies of the "prophetic words" given by Sis. So-and-so the previous Sunday. Actually I don't recall a single Scripture being read or even quoted unless the wording was incidentally mimicked in the KJV-esque language of some "word."

While I was in high school, I developed a strong interest in Church history. But rather than simply read historical narratives, I sought out writings by the history makers themselves so that I could read them in their own words. I quickly became aware that I did NOT find anything I had been taught in church in the writings of the Fathers, Reformers or Puritans. I slowly began to realize that my theology had changed. I still struggled with letting go of my beliefs about the Holy Spirit. For many years I reasoned that the extraordinary gifts were real and for us today, but that what we generally witness are abuses or fakes. This idea was undoubtedly fed by the numerous books I read exposing clowns like Hinn, which were written by fellow Pentecostals. It took some time for me to finally arrive at the conclusion that these manifestations of extraordinary gifts are all fake. The real, historical ones served their purpose in the early Church, but are not for the Church today. I finally realized that in my whole life, I had never actually witnessed a manifestation I could unquestionably call “real.” George Smeaton’s book, “The Doctrine of the Holy Spirit” was a tremendous help to me. When I started seminary I discovered that what I had become is called a Calvinist and even a cessationist (gasp!). I had to rebuild my theology from the ground up.

During my MDiv studies, I researched more of the heretical qualities of the charismatic movement and wrote a paper on it. The impetus for the paper (apart from its being an assignment) was Tertullian’s observation that heresies are a necessary trial of the church to show the true and false believers. (Paul says the same thing in 1 Cor. 11:19.) I was terrified at the enormities of these Pentecostal and Charismatic preachers. All the unverifiable claims and extra-biblical revelations! It would be comical if it weren’t blasphemous.

God graciously brought me out of that stuff and I have not looked back. I have friends who have come out of the same background, but unlike them, I have no fond memories of it. I feel healthier spiritually the farther away from it I get. God is good. Scripture is the only revelation I’ll ever need.